Preparing to play a bigger game

Making a commitment to becoming a Balanced Leader can feel daunting. Doubts and fears arise. In a frantic world do I have the necessary skills and capacity? What behaviours will I need to develop and how can I model these for others?

Getting it right is a concern for many women. We’re brought up to be ‘good girls’ who play by the rules. We worry about making mistakes and know we’re likely to be judged harshly when we do.

In an earlier blog I wrote about Herminia Ibarra’s assertion that in order to think like a leader we must first act our way into leadership. When we’re pioneering a new concept like Balanced Leadership that can be easier said than done. One solution is to work with a coach to define future behaviours in line with our values; and to draw up a plan that enables us to grow into them. Coaching theory even suggests we connect with our future self who already has this covered and let her pull us forward.

But how do we best connect with that future self – one of many possible selves we could become – so that we become clear on which skills and qualities are essential for our focus and success?

The solution lies in feeling into new behaviours rather than trying to solve everything with our minds. And Appreciative Inquiry offers us a powerful process for doing this.

Becoming curious about what makes a Balanced Leader – and putting that curiosity at the heart of our thinking – we’re ready to work through the four stages of Discovery, Dreaming, Design and Delivery.

Key to the process is asking ourselves positive and generative questions that focus clearly on possibilities. So in the Discovery phase we begin by considering what’s already out there in our organisation that looks like Balanced Leadership. Can we think of tangible role models or even small instances of appropriate behaviour? When do we see it happening and in what context?

We begin to Dream about the possibilities for demonstrating Balanced Leadership ourselves. What skills will we need to enhance? What do we need to commit to in terms of new behaviours?

As the possibilities begin to take shape in our minds we’re ready to Design a new way of being. We consider what we’ll do differently and identify the support we’ll need to stay on track – both at work and at home.

Finally we’re ready to Deliver – or as the AI practitioners would say – we’re moving into our Destiny.